In order to understand verbal communication skills better, we should look into some of the principles that exist around this area. Only when we consider these principles and understand why they exist when we communicate are we able to increase effectiveness when we share our feelings and thoughts with those around us.
Figurative Verbal Communication Skills
The language we use consists of words. These words themselves do not have meaning. They are only figurative symbols that were agreed upon to symbolize things that we have experienced. Words are used to represent physical objects or express thoughts and feelings. For example, the word “chair” represents a four legged platform where we sit. There is nothing in the word “chair” that resembles what a chair actually is and it is merely a symbol that people have assigned and agreed on.
Directed by Rules
There are three primary types of rules when using language: syntactic, semantic and pragmatic. Syntactic rules help us to formulate sentences properly (something Yoda did not learn in Star Wars). Although the meaning may still come across, syntax helps us to regulate and form consistency in how we construct sentences. Semantic rules are used when given meaning to words and learning how to interpret them. Meanings help explain the figurative nature of words, for example, a “telephone” is something that we talk into to communicate with friends and a “horse” is a tall four legged creature that we can ride. Pragmatic rules help us to determine understanding and interpretation of the meaning of the words in a sentence in a certain context. This type of rule helps us to understand how the situation and the individual we are communicating with are related. For example, the meaning “I am fast” means something different coming from a runner, a student taking an exam or a waiter at a restaurant. Without this rule, verbal communication skills can be taking out of context easily and even the most basic sentences would not be understood.
Subjective
The reason that language is considered subjective is because we cannot assume that the meaning for one word is interpreted by everyone else in the same way. Because of the nature of this reality, this means that we usually need to negotiate the meaning of what a certain word means with the individual we are communicating with before it becomes unanimous. Only by continuing to converse with others and exchanging ideas will we be able to create mutually shared meanings. For example, the word “restaurant” represent many things for different people, ranging from fine dining, to a diner serving breakfast all day, to a Chinese food place or a burger bar.
Boundaries
Language allows us to create boundaries for the things around us so that we can get across our meaning more effectively. When use language to set boundaries for our experiences, feelings, thoughts and people, they are defined and limited to what we want to share by how we use our words. For example if someone asked you “what do you like to do” you can respond with “I like hiking”, you are limiting the other persons understanding of you. You certainly do like hiking, but you also like cooking, watching TV, playing basketball, coin collecting and many other things that do not fit into one sentence. In this way, the language and verbal communication skills that we use allows us to create a boundary on the information that we share when we communicate.
Creativity In Verbal Communication Skills
Even after everyone has agreed on the meanings and understandings of words, the multitude of combination of words allow us to be creative in how we want to express ourselves. When using verbal communication, we can get across the same message with different tones in regards to how we decide to express ourselves. Understanding these principles of verbal communication allow us to see how important our choice of words is. Improving your verbal communication skills allow you to pick the right thing to say, how to say it, when to say it, why we say it affect the message that will be received by the individual we are trying to communicate with.
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